A Mask Of Sanity

A Mask Of Sanity

Suicide, it was something that was constantly running around my mind, I guess everyone has thought about it from time to time, about their own mortality, about a loved one or friend who has dared to mention the “S” word whilst upset or depressed, I bet many a sleepless night are had from the threat of, or the attempt of suicide.

But that’s the problem, it’s always them and us, the givers and the takers the movers and the shakers, I’m not in any way of suggesting that I’m going to top myself or ‘do myself in’ if you prefer and that puts me into the category of ‘us’, if I was in the category of ‘them’ then I probably wouldn’t be here right now, I certainly wouldn’t be thinking about suicide and I suppose I wouldn’t be trying to find all those people who could come under the ‘them’ category, them people who actually go through with it, who take their own lives, they are the ones I’m looking for, not to help them or make them see sense, where would be the fun in that?, I want to know how far I can push them before they crack, can I push them to the edge then reel them back in at my pleasure? Then when I’m finished with them in my own experiment on a suicidal maniac, just let them do it. I want to know what drives these people to that edge of no return then see if it works on regular people, those who are placed in the ‘us’ category, is that murder? I don’t know. The morel fibres in me suggest that what I’m doing is wrong, but the rest of me, the parts that matter, tell me this’ll be fun.